The Fork in the Road

By now you might have a recording, or an answer from the person who sleeps beside you. Either way, this is the most important chapter in the story, and it's the one most snoring websites skip.

Because snoring comes in two very different kinds.

The first is simple snoring. Air squeezes past relaxed tissue in your nose, mouth or throat, and that tissue vibrates. It's noisy and it can wreck a partner's night, but your breathing keeps going. This is the kind that over-the-counter devices are designed for.

The second kind is a warning sign. In obstructive sleep apnea, the airway doesn't just narrow. It closes, again and again, sometimes dozens of times an hour. Your breathing stops. Your oxygen drops. Your brain jolts you just awake enough to start breathing again, usually with a snort or a gasp, and then you drift off and it starts over. You remember none of it. You just wake up exhausted.

Sleep apnea is common, and many people who have it don't know. Left untreated, it's linked to high blood pressure, heart problems, stroke, and accidents caused by daytime sleepiness. It's also very treatable once it's found.

So here is the fork in the road.

Take the doctor path first if any of these sound like you: someone has seen you stop breathing in your sleep. Your recording has silences that end in a gasp or a choke. You feel exhausted during the day, however long you sleep. You've nodded off somewhere you shouldn't, especially behind the wheel. You wake with headaches, get up to use the bathroom several times a night, or have been told your blood pressure is high.

If that's you, talk to your doctor and ask about a sleep study. These days it can often be done at home, in your own bed, with a small device you wear for a night or two. If it turns out to be sleep apnea, there are proper treatments, from breathing machines to custom mouthpieces fitted by a dentist.

Please don't reach for a store-bought mouthpiece instead. It might make you quieter. Your partner might finally sleep through the night. And the one symptom that told you something was wrong would go silent, while the problem underneath carries on.

The other path is for everyone else. If your snoring is steady, with no pauses or gasps, and you feel reasonably rested most days, you're most likely dealing with simple snoring. That's frustrating, but it's very fixable, and that's where the rest of this story goes.

The next step is working out where your snoring actually starts.